“People only want to know you when you have reached the peak of your success, not when you’re building it.”
Never a truer word spoken. I SOOOOOOO believe that, to the point that it inspired my blog post today.
I had to re-tweet that the moment I saw it and before bed made a call to fabsnetwork [his Twitter name] to see how he was getting on with his many a business ventures. I mentioned that tweet to him because as soon as I saw it, I thought of him.
On April 1st 2010 he sent out a broadcast message on BBM saying he had secured a £1.2million deal with Google. My eyes lit up and I was ecstatic for him. I held off from calling him. Why? I knew for a FACT that he would have had a ton of people instantly calling and texting him on the sight of £1.2 million alone. I asked him and he said his phone was blowing up something crazy. After I sat back and thought about it with my dodo self, I realised he had played an April’s Fool prank. OK so, I had been got but I ONLY believed it because I know just how HARD he works and is always off to some meeting and trying to secure some deal, so to me that ‘make believe’ deal was not far fetched. I see him doing his thing and you know when you just know someone is going to do what they set out to achieve??? Well that’s him! I gave him some advice and told him to watch the people that are checking for him now, and watch those that come out of the woodwork when something major happens and want in on celebrating his success with him. He’s not silly. He saw a prime example with that April Fools joke and I’m glad some people showed their true colours at the sight of money. All of a sudden they knew his name. All of a sudden they just had to pick up the phone and call.
I don’t support people just because I support them because I believe in them and see their potential.
If you start your own business, cause or campaign, getting people to support you is tough. There are two things that are very noticeable and suck big time.
1. When the people closest to you don’t even have your back, support you or show any interest.2. When you get to a certain level, the people who apply to number 1 all of a sudden know you and want in. They now realise you were serious about yours all along and not a fluke talking about what you were going to do.
When you’re on your way to making it, you’re a joke and an embarrassment. The minute you achieve a little something, now you’re all of a sudden credible to them???
Why are people only ready to pick up the phone and call FAB when they see a BBM broadcast message that mentions pound signs?
Is Jade’s phone going to blow up with people from her past when she gets leading roles in film and television?
Are people going to tell you “I knew you could do it!” when you got to where you are at? The same people who LIE through their teeth and never even uttered those words to you on your way up.
Anyone who supports you now during the hard times when your dreams are down on paper or in your head GENUINELY has your back. They support you because they believe in your dream along with you. Sometimes they believe for you when you may not believe even believe in yourself all that much at times. Anyone that you know who supports you AFTER you’ve made it to where you want to be, needs to be kept at a firm distance. Trust me, these people will be the ones that if you lost it all, will disappear just as fast as they popped up.
Surround yourself with like minded individuals
Meaning if you’re trying to get ahead in business, surround yourself with established people in business or others like yourself who are serious about becoming a businessman/woman. Get a mentor, network, and stick with those folks. If you want to be in business, then be about business. Don’t be about Pookie n dem who have no desire to get ahead. Let them do them. Spending most of your time around Pookie will not help you to progress to the next level, because you and Pookie are on a different level entirely. If they’re good people/friends to you and only good for hanging out, dinner, drinks, clubbing, then hang out, dine, drink and club when you have the time to do so. Don’t get distracted, but don’t neglect or cut off your friends either, just divvy up your time wisely.
If you have some friends like I do that have no drive or desire to start a business then don’t chat your business about your business to them. You will not get any support in the sense that you are hoping for and will often find yourself very frustrated with them. Those not wanting to do the same as you is fine, it really is. We all have different goals and aspirations in life.
If you need a little or sometimes a big hand with something and they never follow through for you after they say they will, then do the following. Make a mental note of who they are, check how often they call you and/or wanting favours, then keep doing you. You know why? When you’ve done you to the fullest, made it and been successful I bet you you’ll have either a very jealous friend or one who is all of a sudden VERY supportive. Check them on that when the time comes and remind them that they couldn’t even respond to an e-mail, phone call or come through when you needed them the most.
Beforehand save the frustration that’s mounted up in the pit of your belly and create your little black book. Use this as a means of inspiration to press and push forward and become very accomplished in your goals. Don’t use it to cuss them out and tell them "they ain’t shit!" It will only set you back as you don’t need any upset during ‘Operation Do You’ time. On the right side write down the names of the ones in your corner, on the left side the names of the ones that weren’t. When it comes to the celebratory gathering, shout out, acknowledgement of the ones who helped you along the way, open that book, pick up the mic, refer to and thank the right side ONLY. Drop the mic and exit the stage to the left. Let whoever want to get vex, get vex. You yourself were vex when they weren’t helping you out or supporting you. You held it in continued to do you, and got on with it. That’ll be your exhale moment. You asked, they declined, or did not support you. They could have been on the right side of your book if they really wanted to. Instead you got left, so that’s where they stay too.
Continue to believe in yourself and remain focused. The reality of it is the people we expect to care and support 100% actually don’t. The realisation of this can be shocking and to some very hurtful. Like I said, pay close attention, watch them, but watch what you’re doing even more. Sometimes I like to ‘test’ those closest to me, ask them for support in some way, when needed and see if they come through. I’ve noticed it’s the same culprits all the time that don’t. LondonDiva knows when her phone rings, when people say good luck, when people do the smallest of favours she asks, when people help her out. She remembers. [Enough of talking about myself in the third person].
The sad thing is that sometimes along the way the ones that help you the most are strangers or people that you don’t know very well. These people will outnumber the ones that you thought would have your back when asked.
So read it again and let it sink in
“People only want to know you when you have reached the peak of your success, not when you’re building it.”
Thank you Jade.
You are speaking to me right now. This week I have been busting my guts to promote, prepare and do everything I can to make my business grow. 2 weeks ago I sent out two emails to two different people with the mind that they would be ecstatic at the chance I was giving them. I got no response from those emails or the follow up emails I sent later. On Monday, there is a change a'coming and these people heard about that change and are now emailing, texting and talking ish about how it's unprofessional& vindictive of my ass not to reply their late b.s emails. It's not that I'm not replying, I didn't have the time and had told them that deadline to reply was last week anyway.
ReplyDeleteI have to be thankful for the people who give a damn when the business was just an idea and not make apologies for who I am. Thank you so much for both those lessons this week.