She Is...[My Ode to My Women]

She is the survivor of molestation and abuse suffered at the hands of a family member or a friend of the family.
She is the girl abandoned by her father before she was born.
She is the single mother.
She is the young girl when the system failed her made a stand.
She is the young girl who tried to commit suicide. Failed and now lives for everything.
She is the woman with an eating disorder.
She is the woman who graduated from University with a 1st or a 2:1.
She is the woman not afraid to travel the world by herself.
She is the young girl that taught herself black history when the schools didn't.
She is the woman who held her child whilst he drew his last breath.
She is Independent. Even when married.
She is the woman solely putting her child through Private School with no help from the father.
She is the woman who was able to buy her own property. Not once, not twice, but three times over.
She is the woman that had to visit her son in prison.
She is the woman that brought a child into the world.
She is the woman abandoned by a black man, abused by a black man, disrespected by a black man, and still chose a black man for a husband.
She is the woman that was brave enough to leave loved ones behind and start a new life thousands of miles away.
She is the soon-to-be mother, wife, full-time working woman studying for her Masters Degree.
She is the young girl who helped to raise the babies in the family before she was even a woman herself.
She is the woman not afraid to speak her mind and stand firmly by her beliefs.
She is the woman that held your hand whilst you were giving birth because he wasn't man enough to be in the room.
She is the woman that waited for you for 5 faithful years while you were serving time in prison.
She is the woman that never spoke ill of you to their child after you contributed £200 for the whole year for her upkeep.
She is the woman that miscarried your child.
She is the woman that takes on everybody's problems and isn't ashamed to get help for her own.
She is the woman who tried to hold the family together while you were out cheating or gambling.
She is the woman who's had to look after a sick mother.
She is the woman who had to bury her child.
She is the woman who has heard every bad thing about her and still continues to rise above it all.
She is the woman who made no excuses for her excellence and didn't let what other people thought of her as a black woman hold her back.
She is the woman that prays for her friends and family.
She is the woman to lend you advice when you most need it.
She is the woman whose heart was broken over and over again yet still believed in love.
She is the good woman that found a good man, said YES to his proposal and never had to compromise who she was.
She is the woman that gets out when she's had enough.
She is the little girl who had to watch mummy and daddy separate and divorce.
She is the little girl who saw daddy raise his hand to mummy, and got her plastic doctor's kit out to make you feel better.
She is the young girl who had to get a job in order to contribute to the running of the house.
She is the woman who was told she may never be able to have children.
She is the woman always looking to better herself.
She is the woman who has made mistakes and learned from it.
She is the woman who chooses to not to be pigeon-holed amongst other women by you through your bad experiences.
She is the woman that doesn't label all men as dogs, and takes each man on his own merit.
She is the woman that listens and holds her man when he's had a bad day.
She is the support system, the backbone, the pillar of strength.
She is the woman that continues to go for that job and get it.
She is the woman who is verbally and publicly slandered because she chooses not to acknowledge your disrespectful approach and manner and set standards for herself.
She is the woman that got you up for school in the morning, washed, clothed, fed, combed your hair and still made it to work on time. With both children.
She is the woman who made sure you experienced the world and different cultures as a child.
She is the woman, when the school system was failing you made sure you got extra tuition to get better grades in school.
She is the woman that paid ALL of the bills.
She is the woman that worked 2 or 3 jobs to make ends meet.
She is the woman even when tired, still had to keep on going.
-LondonDiva


I know these women. Some are friends. Some are family. Some relate to me. They are all real and true life experiences the good and the bad that I've heard of or encountered that those close to me have been through.

I am T-I-R-E-D of hearing negativity spouted about black women and the way we are. Did those that continually spout out this drivel actually take the time to stop and stand in the moment and think about a lot of what some people have gone through in their lives?

You aren't just born bitter. Born Angry. Born frustrated. Certain life experiences shape the way you become. Why we continue to be labelled in a negative manner I don't know, but I certainly refuse to accept it, especially when the women I know despite their flaws are truly remarkable.

You may know her. You may just be her.
Do not make excuses for the way that you are.
Be an angry black woman if that's how you feel.
Be a frustrated black woman if that's how you feel. Be the loving, happy, joyous, strong, nurturing and grateful black woman that you are.
Make no apologies for being human.
For all of the good and bad that you go through, it's your right.