6 Jul 2011

Dearest @SinittaOfficial On Behalf of Mariah, I Urge You To STOP!

"Dahhhlings what the f*** is a Sinitta?
I'm sipping tea as I write this. Yes folks...sipping tea. Trying to balance my damn chakras at the same time but was alerted to some "tom foolery, trying to snatch a diva's wig" madness yesterday via The Lava Lizard. I must forewarn you this is a signature LD post aka long. So make some tea yourself and sip along with me.

Like myself, Trent who runs, works and twerks The Lava Lizard is a HUGE Mariah fan. I won't go as far as to call myself a stan (another blog post dissecting that term maybe needed one day), there is a DISTINCT difference between fan and stan, that I need to educate folks on, but like I said another time...

I am a lifelong fan, supporter of the diva and her work. I have been since the beginning of her career and always will be. I can, have and will be vocal about Mariah's work and have no problem stating my dislike for some of it. I'm certainly never biased when it comes to my opinion of anyone I admire in the media spotlight.

**Sips tea**

OK so here goes, Sinitta.....Yes Sinitta....I said Sinitta. The mere fact that I'm actually having to STATE she WAS an amazing a mediocre pop star in the 80's when TRUE UK vocal talent was being conceived in bedrooms, taking their first steps and playing with their building blocks...talking about Leona, Adele and Jessie J  to name a few right now.

Sinitta is to the UK, what Latoya Jackson is to the US (minus the incredibly talented family behind her).

During a horrendous period in the 80's I was subjected to Sinitta after the misfortune of my parents bypassing the USA on a boat which headed straight for the UK from Jamaica. As a then faithful attendee of an Evangelical church, God answered my prayers as a little girl, and it was only for a very short time that I was subjected to the amazing lyrics and beautifully composed pieces the bubblegum crap that was churned out from this woman. God took away her 'career' and I slept much better at night.

Somewhere down the line during my teens and twenties I don't think I was that faithful to the Lord as I should have been, and he reminded me just how great his works were and could change things around at a moments notice. That moment my dear blog readers was seven years ago when a new talent show format hit the UK TV screens in the form of Simon Cowell's brainchild The  X Factor.

Sinitta: The has been, who was never quite 'all there'.
There was a segment on the show where some of the narrowed down contestants would go to the 'judges houses' and sing in front of the chosen judge  & celebrity guest judge, who was to mentor them throughout the competition in the hope of winning the title and a £1 million pound recording contract.

Why did I think my eyes were deceiving me when I saw this woman saunter onto my TV screen as the failed singer, demoted ex-girlfriend and now promoted 'hanger on' to Simon Cowell, sit beside him to HELP choose the best acts to be put through to the final?

It WAS Sinitta! My eyes didn't deceive me. I picked up my bible and flipped through to every powerful verse known to man to rebuke this woman off of my TV screen. It didn't work. Now seven years and 43,000+ fans on Twitter later she's bleating about 'coming for Mariah' who may have a small, yet coveted spot alongside Simon Cowell on The USA X-Factor. With Simon moving to the US for this show, has God heard me and answered me yet again? Is this an instance where God has decided to work in his very own time, and not my own?
"Well, let's just say feathers will fly if Mariah takes my spot. Although she is a mega diva vocally, you can expect another 'X Factor' USA drama. I won't just roll over and take it. I hope she can run in high heels."  -Sinitta
Can Sinitta dodge a Swarovski encrusted $800, 5 inch heel, platform shoe?

First of all Sinitta, Mariah is more than a vocalist. Singer, songwriter, producer when it comes to her work. You better recognise. Unlike another great vocalist who I simply adore which is Celine Dion, Celine is a vocalist who pretty much has her music written and produced for her. Mariah is and always has been very hands on when it comes to her musical career.

Secondly, ain't no s*** or feathers flying up in this dancerieee. I beg this woman go and put on Mariah's 'Fly Like a Bird' and really know what it means to have feathers flying in the form of a great vocal on a beautifully written track.

Thirdly, I beg you just roll over and take it Sinitta because I can see what's happening here. You know full well that 'spot' isn't yours, but will act to fight it like it is just to gain some publicity and hopefully a name for yourself to the American public. Whilst they do this (or they won't) it's a great plug for your new talent finding venture that I'm not about to give any publicity to. Cheryl Cole isn't even talented, yet has more talent than you, so just what in the hell is that saying when they didn't even want her?

Sinitta dressing like THIS to help pick talent in 2009
X Factor in 2010 looking a hot arse mess!
Sinitta, ladies and gentleman. Simon Cowell's main hanger on stroke attention whore who thinks she has the right to even suggest going up against Mariah for a role to help Simon pick the talent on a TALENT show. Mariah's LEGACY is enough to grant her that coveted spot on X-Factor, and if you ask me it's been LONG overdue. Yes Sinitta carry on with your transparent self, using the name of a current living legend to try and become and remain more relevant. Is she hoping for another invitation on Daybreak as a result of this s*** coming out? Cheryl Cole gets dropped from X-Factor and they call this dumbass X-Factor 'spokesperson' in to talk about it.

M.C. in jewelry worth more than Sinitta's fortune!
I wasn't even going to post about Mariah's small role in X-Factor, I've heard the news for months that Simon said he has a role for her on the show debuting on FOX in the autumn. Sinitta is making a song and dance about it and really needs to fall back! Attention whores like her jump through these hoops as part of their attention whoring antics. I hope she appreciates the attention I'm giving her all up and through blog.

This woman has no gottdamn talent whatsoever and she wants to big up her chest to a real talent, a diva, a woman who has graced hundreds of magazine covers, broken musical records, has shelves lined up with awards? Sinitta is embarrassing herself (yet again) and it's about time someone told her.

I have a GREAT memory and can only remember TWO of this woman's Grammy Award winning hits being 'So Macho' and 'Toy Boy.' You Tube it if your browser can handle that amount of mediocrity without crashing. I'm not about to post her crap on here.

What would the look on the US contestants faces be like when Simon introduces this woman that nobody over there has heard of dressed like a fool?

Exactly!

Now picture their faces and the excitement when Mariah Carey steps out! Mouths open, eyes wide, sweaty palms and shock amazement. There may even be some tears. When mentored on UK X-Factor in 2008 Alexandra Burke almost passed out when she saw her foot coming down the stairs. Yes folks! Mariah's foot alone will cause excitable distress to many! The type of response only a true talent can bring on. This type of response does not happen when Sinitta enters a room. It's pretty much the same reaction that happens with Louis Walsh's group when they get told they are going to Dublin.

Sinitta took to her Twitter and posted this message...of course she's going to say it was in jest, but you know she's really feeling a way about this already. Please note Mariah has a 4-5 octave voice and 5 Grammy Awards! I don't know what an octive is, and Mariah has 2 grannies not a thousand.

How about a muth f***** career for a start & the ability to spell!
Sinitta's faN (cannot believe she has these people begging for a retweet) claimed she has warmth and love. Errrrm and Mariah is the devil? A woman dedicated to her fans and loves them tremendously. That idiot needs to fall back further than Sinitta.

There is no argument even necessary to even state WHY Mariah deserves a guest spot on X-Factor, but if you do, I'll remind you of the following:
  • Mariah's biggest flop of her entire career 'Glitter' has and will always be bigger than Sinitta's career ever was and is.
  • How is someone who is holding up a marker pen and paper sign to prove that it is their Twitter account and not even verified hoping for a spot on ANY show? Did she take this picture in a disabled toilet? I'm only asking because the space looks tight and that handrail is throwing me off! That is shameful! Fill in the necessary paperwork and submit it to Twitter. Or is it lack of information of you on the Internet posing a problem that a) they don't even know you exist and b) you aren't worthy enough of a verified account?
Humble yourself Sinitta. This is shameful!
  • BEFORE birth, Mariah's twins were more famous than Sinitta. Snatching Indian Remy wigs left, right and centre from beyond the womb! Moroccan Scott and Monroe Cannon have nestled in the womb of a legend for 9 long months and have a more deserving place putting through acts to the US X-Factor final.
Mariah & Nick's daughter Monroe has a message for Sinitta!
  • Mariah does in a flawless whistle register what Sinitta wishes could have done with a whole 80's album.
  • Mariah has an entourage. Sinitta IS part of Simon Cowell's. HUGE difference! HUGE! 
  • Mariah jets her friends in on a G5 to her private island to chill. Sinitta has to wait for Simon to be free in his busy schedule for this to happen for her.
  • Jackie Lamb Chops, Jack, JJ, Dolomite, Cha Cha are ALL more famous than Sinitta. Don't know who these are? These are the names of Mariah's Jack Russell Terrier DOGS...yes DOGS who even have fan sites dedicated to them. No one is interested in Sinitta's Cha Cha that's for sure. 
Mariah's dogs ain't no damn joke. They even surf! Does Sinnita even have a dog this fabulous?

JJ, Mariah's dog, doggie husband to Cha Cha and father to Dolomite & Jackie Lamb Chops even took time out of his busy schedule to help Mariah promote E=MC2 for MTV.

  • Has Sinitta ever sung live/collaborated with Patti LaBelle, Aretha 'The Queen' Franklin, Mary J Blige, Pavarotti, Celine Dion, Dru Hill, Diddy, Ma$e, Usher, Diana Ross, Ne-Yo, Twista, Jermaine Dupri, Joe, Westlife, Da Brat, Jay-Z, Boyz II Men, T.I., The Dream, Dave Navarro, Nicki Minaj, Snoop, Pharell, Luther Vandross, Whitney Houston, Trey Lorenz, Olivia Newton John, ODB, Xscape, Lord Tariq & Peter Gunz, Bone Thugs n Harmony, Lil Wayne, Akon, Gloria Estefan, Carole King and then some..? Nope didn't think so....and breathe!! **sips tea**
  • Mariah has mentored on American Idol where they actually has a Mariah week and also mentored on  X-Factor. And the Sinitta week and mentoring from Sinitta happened when exactly....?
  • I have yet to see an American Idol or X-Factor contestant audition with a Sinitta song. This DOESN'T happen for a reason.
  • I have heard Simon tell a contestant to sing another song as a Mariah Carey song was too POPULAR during one season of American Idol. This is what happens when you are great.
  • Real musical legends have pitfalls, low album sales, questionable performances and hurdles in their career, but are still remembered for their greatness overall. Michael Jackson, Janet Jackson, Mariah Carey, Cher, Aretha Franklin, Celine Dion, Whitney Houston etc. It's when you actually fall off completely and don't even belong to a record label that there's actually a problem Sinitta.
  • Mariah's music has actually helped inspire people, removed them from dark periods in their life and even saved lives. With Sinitta's music it's made individuals actually want to end theirs.
  • Sinitta dahhhhling were you ever invited to Ms Oprah Winfrey's 'Legends Luncheon' and presented with a gift of Black & White diamond earrings?...In fact have you ever been on Oprah or sung for the President and the First Lady?
Oprah's Legend's Luncheon honoring some of the greatest Black, female figures of our generation! Sinitta is NOT present!
  • The names of your last five fragrances please Sinitta? In fact can we have the last five album names that roll off the tip of our tongue?
I think Mariah sung it best when she said "You're a mom & pop, I'm a corporation/I'm a press conference, you're a conversation..."

Sinitta is NOT even a conversation in sign language.

No other words are needed or necessary.....I think the throwing of shade has been well and truly dished out for the day.

M.C. may have a opening for a bag carrier if Sinitta is interested!

1 comment:

  1. You just READ Sinitta's ass from top to bottom. I don't even have anything else to add. *stands up and claps*

    ReplyDelete

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