25 Oct 2010

Don't Ask...Cause I'm Not Telling

It has been much longer that 'a while' since I last posted, not because I don't have anything to say, but more so because I have a lot to say. I realise that not everything going on in my life needs to be documented for one and all to see all of the time.

One thing a lot of people have taught me over the recent months, is to keep my personal business private, although I already knew this. Social Networking/Internet has taken an element of privacy out people's lives and made it public knowledge on the World Wide Web. It now gets to a point where you can't escape it.

I remember a time where I used to just tell my immediate family and friends when I was going away on holiday. You know, do the usual, send them my travel information, let them know when I was going and when I'd be back. Now it seems like just because you have people added to your Blackberry or follow some folks on Twitter and keep them amused on a daily basis they now feel the need to be informed of your whereabouts if you suddenly 'disappear.'

For the record...if I go on holiday/take a break from being online people know where I am, and God forbid if something happens to me the people who I would want at my funeral know where I went in the first place. Morbid, but true.

I have a blog, Twitter and Facebook account, I live by myself and don't answer to anyone and am entitled to a certain amount of privacy. I feel and think that some people think that just because you are in contact with them via these means that somehow all of a sudden 'we is family.' We are not!

I was off Twitter for a few weeks and came back to a whole heap of  "where is LondonDiva?" tweets. LondonDiva was not on Twitter, that's all folks needed to know. Like I said those who needed to know knew, and unlike some people I don't feel this burning desire to tweet when I'm going to be off and for how long. You know how black women are "don't ask me where I'm going, I'm gonna be where I'm at."*cue neckroll* 

For a moment looking at all those tweets I was frustrated. Don't get me wrong I understand some people were concerned considering I tweet 100+ times a days then all of a sudden nothing, but still my thing was "who are you? I don't know your first or last name? You don't have my phone number, so is it really concern or is your claat just being nosy?" Could have been either or, but I wasn't in the mood to be checking in with the online world. I checked in the offline world and that was more than enough for me.

Whenever we want, sometimes we are allowed to escape, bugger off and just 'do us' in peace. Have a tranquil moment, do whatever the hell we like, and as much as we may appreciate the concern, sometimes we just don't want to be bothered. I don't want to come back answering questions about where I was. So I don't and I won't. On top of that, I'm not a 'centre of attention' type of person regardless of what you may think, I don't need to announce things 24/7 and have all eyes on me, I like to keep an element of my life private.

In this age of the Internet, I refuse to lose myself to a load of usernames belonging to people I have never met and probably aren't likely to either. Some people put so much of their business out there that even online personal space is being invaded, where folks step to you behind a username asking you where you were. "Err excuse me? Who the f*** is you?" That's like some random who takes the same train as me everyday coming up to me saying "I haven't seen you on this train in a few weeks, where were you?" Don't get it twisted just because you pressed a few buttons and decided to follow me on Twitter. 

In the real world (offline) I'm not telling my co-workers shit. In the online world I'm not telling my followers shit....unless I choose to.

So the moral of the story is...don't ask me shit. I'll tell it, if I wanna tell it, when I wanna tell it.

And to some of you out there, stop chatting your bloody relationship business on that damn thing. Especially the women. Some things are sacred you know and should remain that way Just don't get mad when people start getting in your business and you wonder why. Here's the answer...cause you chat it so much you've pretty much made it their business as they're all up in yours.


  1. LMAO @ So the moral of the story is...don't ask me shit. I'll tell it, if I wanna tell it, when I wanna tell it ----and she's back!! Welcome back to blogging missy, sure hope this is going to be regular, last time you updated was on my birthday..2 months ago..not good..why you treat us like hanimal??..lol..
    I do agree with you though on that some folks do chat too much of their business on twitter/facebook, some things are just meant to be sacred and private not for every-body to see! I've learnt the essence of keeping things private and even some of those close to me aren't told certain stuff because of their loose-lips!

  2. Awwww, but hun it's nice that people missed you. I only hope that people would be bothered enough to ask about me if I suddenly disappeared!

  3. I am guilty of sometimes putting my biz out here a bit too much esp on twitter and bbm but i've learnt a lot these past few weeks......now all i do is *bbm lips are sealed smiley*

  4. She's back!!! Welcome back, still the same straight-talking, say it as it is diva!
    I've gone off twitter and hardly use my bbm cuz i just cant deal with people getting all up in my business

  5. "...the people who I would want at my funeral know where I went in the first place." there is something beautifully awesome about this. Often times, we think everyone ought to be at our funeral (& or occasions).


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